The StairMaster: The Master of the Stairs

The Orville may not be a perfect show but it has a group of aliens who worship Dolly Parton as a wise philosopher so I’m willing to overlook most things.

Seth MacFarlane really said I'm gonna write a show that's funny and hilarious and IN SPACE..... that constantly makes racists, sexists, homophobes, transphobes, xenophobes, fascists and government officials look like fucking morons

A robot with PTSD performs your gender reassignment surgery while your supportive gay dad sings in front of the entire ship to provide political plausible deniability… this is the future liberals want (and god, do i really want it)

The Admirals: What do you call disobeying the law?

The Orville crew: A hobby.

The Admirals: *Crosses their arms*

The Orville crew: That we do not engage in.

bakasara:
“robot romance brainrot :)
”

robot romance brainrot :)

me, as i force a dollar bill into the self-checkout machine: thats right…..good boy……vore president washington

im begging all of you to stop reblogging th is

Your actions have consequences

the amazing devil needs to stop making such pussy pounding heart throbbing page tearing goosebump inducing core shaking music fr

the first rule of detective fiction is that the detective in question should ALWAYS just be the nosiest person alive and never be a cop

When I die I wanna be resurrected as the crab in the bucket of crabs that pulls the other crabs back into the bucket. And I'll love doing it

if i could die i would wanna be resurrected as a crab strong enough to pull your crabsona out of the bucket. and then where would you be

You may think it cruel but when a white witch pisses me off I go through her etsy listings for native bird feathers and forward it to fish and wildlife services

Sweats in Salem witch descendant

Keep sweating girl the game wardens on his way

Something I find kinda jarring about this here 21st century is that the average person with an internet connection and an ounce of pirating know-how has access to more movies and tv shows than anyone has ever had in the history of forever and yet there are still people trying to argue that the screenwriter strike is bad because it means we might experience a temporary lack of new television

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this person just followed me. new type of guy just dropped (important info: i am a minor)

this isn't the full rant btw. it keeps fucking going.

*walks into your house* its quite lovely in here i *spots a ghostly apparition* ...................well first who is that saultry little binch in the corner

when i get asked the perfect question that allows me to ramble about a special interest or share something that i recently learned this is what i look like. this is who i turn into

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